Here's my latest post on Mischievous Sweethearts. I hope we can revive our soulsearching loveable blog again, because I miss musing around there with my friend. Also, I'm thinking we can have a guest post from the babe.
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately about the fact that I haven't
been concerned with my spiritual self for a couple of years now. Yes,
I've been praying for these past few months, but my prayers are actually
therapy. I count my blessings and wish really hard for the people in my
life to stay healthy and happy and maybe sometimes I want a thing or
two for myself as well. But it's more like a list to Santa, a hint to
the universe as to what I want from life. However, I have not been
concerned with findind that quiet place inside anymore. That one moment
that lasts forever when I'm nothing and everything at the same time.
That pursuit has been a great part of my life and my dreams for as far
as I can remember. And I've lost it, I let it go, somehow I wondered in a
darker place. I remember saying I'm angry all the time for no reason, I
remember people telling me I've become so self-centered... when I was
actually anything but centered.
The thing is... I don't need to find who I am, it's not about that
anymore. I need to start living more AS myself. I sometimes wonder how
people can still stay innocent or passionate or dreamy at 30 and I think
it's because they can separate themselves from all the crazy exterior
numbing crap. I do that too, but out of habit, I sing in the street and I
dance around the house and I dream on the bus. But once I can
consciously truly go back there, to my place inside of genuine peace and
joy, to restore my faith and see the world as a river, well, only then
I'll be able to be every single day the person I am when nobody's